Sunday, January 30th

Today was much harder than the last few.  I woke up hoping to go to church and just rest.  Instead, I was updated by Holly that things were not good.  So, I called the nurse to ask for some details and basically, Laura's white blood cell count went up; so did the enyzmes in her pancreas.  These are not good signs.  Now, some things you have to know is that the Dr. decided to stop the antibiotics late yesterday and the Octreotide (the medicine that shuts down the pancreas) to see how her body would respond.  I'm not sure that that is exactly the reason, but basically he felt that Laura was ready to try to let her body be a part of this healing process.  So, we are not as bad as Monday and Tuesday, but we did take a few steps backwards today.  They immediately put her back on antibiotics and Octreotide, and her body did start to respond. 
The other possible issue is there is a slight chance of a type of a cyst on her pancreas.  There was not a lot of talk about this other than she will have a scan in the morning.  Her lab results will be available in the morning to see how the enyzmes are doing, as well as her white blood cell count. I will most certainly text out an update as soon as I know.  Please be praying for this.  I am curious how this will affect Laura emotionally and what the next steps will be if she has a cyst.

Laura was able to download some of this new bit of information with her mom Janice.  Janice is an amazing woman of God who knows what it's like to cling to the Lord through trials.  So Janice, being Janice, was prepared to share God's truth with her daughter.  Laura tells me that Janice knew exactly which verses to share with her, and I do believe Holly sent that out to all of you.  I have not read it yet but I will.  The point here is Laura was unshaken.  Her God cemeted the idea in her today that she is His craftsmanship--a work of art!  Yes, she got nervous, but she leaned on her Best Freind and He caught her.  Stood her up. Brushed her off and then fought her battle while she rested.  That was the vision I kept seeing today.

Some of you probably know that Laura has been able to walk the hallways a bit.  Carrie was so excited to do this with her last night (I so appreciate you Carrie and Dan!).  As I said before, Carrie had the night shift, and Laura told me that Carrie had a great time with God all night before Carrie told me the same thing.  Just a little insight into our marriage at this point...Laura does this to me all the time.  She will know what's going on in my heart before I tell her, and then when I am so thrilled to share she says, "I know" before I'm finished.  Totally frustrating!  Moving on...

Anyhow, Laura overall seemd unmoved today.  Strengthened.  Prayerful.  Continue to pray for her emotions, because we have a ways to go.  The doctor said that the setbacks could happen a few more times.  That will be hard for all of us, including Laura.  So, she will not be having surgery to remove her gallbladder just yet, and there is no move in to another room for awhile.  This will be really hard on Kaitlyn and Kaden as well.  I was hoping that they would be able to see her soon.  They aren't allowed in the trauma unit, so it may be a while.  Please be praying for them.  They have been my little warriors through this.  They (we) have been so blessed to have all of you in our lives.  They have fun everyday, and I know that there are so many of you that want to help with them.  I value all of you.

Personally, today was my hardest day.  I felt the overwhelming need to not allow Laura out of my sight once I got to the hospital.  Just watching her gives me comfort.  I want to take a minute to say something to the guys that I shared with some close friends of mine...What would you do to serve your wife if she could not do anything?  I am learning this all week.  I am no example.  My only point is to ask yourself how you could serve your wife.  She is your wife.  Your closest partner.  Do all you can to honor her.  You must be used in your marriage to honor God ,even if it is in spite of yourself.  Again, I hope none of you are forced to learn the way I am, but I also realize that some of you may have been through something like this.  All I'm saying is: Please strengthen your spouse.  They deserve it because they are God's daughters.

My struggle today was very personal.  I can share only a piece with you all.  Satan has a way of using past experiences in my life when I least expect it.  I have a physical response in my stomach and body when I want something suddenly in my life that I have been free of for almost 15 years.  I struggled through the morning with pain and worry.  When I dropped off the kids, my good friend Kristine could tell I was off for other reasons than Laura.  She did not ask but I later shared through text as I watched Laura sleep.  I asked Kristine to share with our small group, and before you knew it Mr. Justin Pritchard was on his way with a Holy cup of coffee!  I needed to know that Justin was there, but I waited a long time to leave Laura.  When I came out of the room I was only then starting to know how to respond to people, but the waiting room was too FULL of my awesome family.  I tried to walk by quickly and not be seen, but Holly caught me and kept walking with me.  I had no idea where I was going but I knew I needed to keep going.  Holly kind of followed me around a bit then put her hand on my back and prayed.  I felt peaceful.  No pain. No stomach twitching. No attack. My focus became clear again, and I was ready to be strong again.  My God lifted me in that moment.  I am not usually so open about my faith with people I don't know, but at this very moment in my life I can think of no better thing to boast about than the work Christ is doing in my life and with my family. 

The day ended well.  I saw some really special people today.  Sarah, Roy, Dave Turner, Steven, Tiffany, Aunt Kathy, Joan, Uncle Fred, Laurie B, Michelle, and some other usual suspects!  I can not express how much I value all of you.  Today I realized that the depth of my realtionship with you all has no description for it.  I love you all.

J.P.

One more quick thing...Lyndsay approached me tonight at the concert at the church (which I just was not ready to be out at yet) and she told me how much Laura means to her.  She told me that I probably don't know her but she teared up when talking about my lovely wife.  Thank you Lyndsay for sharing.  I feel the same way about Laura.

My point is that after reflecting a bit on that moment with Lyndsay, I realized that it was so good to hear someone talk about Laura that way.  When you see me around church, please tell me more about Laura.  She means  a lot to me too.